The Worst of It

I see some pretty awful things most days. Anytime you're in the slums you're bound to see something that disturbs you or hear stories that are heartbreaking. I meet people that have insanely hard lives and tell you crazy stories about their homes being burned down because of the tribe they're from or their husband dying from AIDS after he gave it to them first or their children dropping out of school because they can't afford the fees. I see mothers crying in the streets and sending their 3 year olds out to beg for money so they can buy food. I see kids covered in flies and dirt, playing in piles of trash next to a herd of goats. I see entire homes that are smaller than my bedroom. I hear stories about prostitutes and alcoholics and AIDS patients and rape victims and people who are too poor to rent a shack in the slums. But what's funny is that these aren't the people that affect me the most. Don't get me wrong, it's all heartbreaking and terrible to see, but it's not what gets to me most of the time.

There are 2 things that I see in and around the slums that kill me the most, even more than all the things I mentioned before. The first one is people with disabilities. There are SO many it's unbelievable. Most of them are leg problems, their legs are deformed or they're missing feet or limbs. And so far I haven't seen a single wheelchair...at least not the American type. They have hand bikes that look kind of like large tricycles, but they're expensive and most disabled people can't afford them. There are tons of people who have to constantly use crutches because one or both of their legs don't work. I saw one man begging on the streets who had no arms and no legs, just laying on a blanket, with tubes running in and out of his body. There was one guy on the street whose leg was bloody and broken and had metal correctors sticking out of it. I've seen a few people who can't walk, so they put flip flops on their knees and crawl around that way. The first time I saw someone with a pretty intense disability was my first week here. I was in the slums and saw an old woman crawling toward me. She had legs but they didn't work, so she had flip flops on her hands and was pulling herself around, almost army crawling down the sidewalk. It was the closest I've come to crying so far. It was just so dehumanizing, this elderly woman crawling around on the sidewalk. She couldn't afford a wheelchair so this was her only option. It was awful.

What really kills me about this is that they don't have to live this way. Many of them probably wouldn't be disabled at all if they had received proper medical attention when they were born or after whatever accident caused their problems. If they lived in America they'd be leading happy, productive lives. They'd have the help they needed and the tools and resources to get around. But they just don't have those kinds of options here. Many of them have no one, no families, to help them, especially the ones that beg on the streets. We got curious about a lot of the people who have no legs and no arms who beg in the cities, just about how they got there and who's bringing them and if they have people to care for them. We asked and were told they have "friends" who bring them into the city to beg, leave them there for the day, and then come back in the evenings and take all the money they've made, leaving the disabled person with nothing. So it's not even like we can give them money and it will help them, since the money will just end up going to the "friends." It's really hard to walk by these people on a daily basis, knowing there's nothing you can do to help them. It's not that they're just poor, a lot of them are in genuinely hopeless situations.

There was one guy that a teammate of mine met that was different, though. They met him at his home during a visit with Missions of Hope. He had been disabled since birth and had no legs. He used his hands to crawl around. Then a year or so ago he was trying to cross the street and got hit by a mutatu, one of the public transportation buses. He was in the hospital for a number of months and was disabled even more severely after that, but they said he still had an amazing hope and spirit and an intense love for Christ, despite his situation. Instead of giving up and begging in the streets, he started his own business. He crawled outside of his home in the slums every morning and made chips to sell in the streets. I never met this guy, but his story has really stuck with me. Unfortunately, not all of the people I've seen have the same hope, which is really heartbreaking.

The other thing that I have a hard time with are the street boys that wander around the slums. Most of them are teenagers, though some are as young as 10 or 11. They either dropped out of school or couldn't afford to go anymore and spend their days wandering the slums, sniffing bottles of glue. They can't afford drugs or alcohol so they get high off glue. What's crazy is that they don't try to hide it or anything, they just sit in the streets with their faces buried in bottles of glue. They stumble around with glazed eyes and tattered clothes. Sometimes they pass out on the streets and look like dead bodies just sprawled out in the dirt. What kills me about these boys is their complete lack of hope for their own lives. Most of the people I meet have really difficult lives and live in terrible conditions, but they have hope. They have a love for Christ that is contagious. They trust Him with their lives and they constantly thank Him for everything they do have. But these boys don’t have any of that. They’ve literally given up on their lives and are just trying to escape reality by getting high. It’s just heartbreaking to see. Most of these boys are so young and have so much potential to become something great, but they can’t see that. All they see ahead of them is a life in the slums and they’ve given up even trying to get out and into a better life.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s hard to see anyone suffering, no matter how happy they seem to be. But it’s so much easier to deal with when you know the people are ok spiritually and have joy and goals and hope for their future. It’s so difficult to see people who obviously have nothing but pain and desperation in their lives and know there’s nothing I can do to directly help them.